When your husband tells you, "Give the valet parking guy a few extra dollars and have him  unzip your dress," you know it's going to be a night to remember—but maybe I should start at the beginning.

June 10, 2005. Dona Morgan, Selby Gardens COO, calls and asks me to chair the 25th anniversary Orchid Ball. I tell her I need to look at my schedule for the upcoming year. But I know I’m going to say yes. I love, love, love to do anniversary years—whether it’s agreeing to be president of a board or chairing an event, I can’t resist the glamour of an anniversary. It’s always bigger, better and more fun than the rest. It’s a great opportunity to gather the “old gals” together and show appreciation for all the hard work they’ve done in the past, along with reminding them to remember their affection for the organization by putting it in their estate plans. Plans for a luncheon for past Orchid Ball chairs are already spinning in my head.

For the New College Library Association, I've chaired anniversary events for Mistletoe Ball and Pique-nique sur la Baie; and I chaired the Town Hall anniversary for Ringling School of Art and Design Library Association. I was president of Junior League of Sarasota and Ringling School Library Association on big anniversary years. And that’s not even talking about the huge 50th anniversary of the Selby Foundation I coordinated last year. I like to think of myself as the anniversary queen!

But back to the most important thing of all when planning for what is frequently called the most beautiful party in Sarasota: What will I wear? Dress designing goes into overdrive.

June 29. I have my first meeting with Dona and Emily Chalker Lane, Selby’s membership person. We don’t know each other well and start the delicate dance between chair and staff. I tell them my vision of the event; they tell me theirs. Luckily, nothing is revealed that won’t fit into each other’s vision.

Dona tells me her one non-negotiable—she wants chandeliers in the tent. OK by me. I tell them my one non-negotiable—Phil Mancini. I don’t do an event without the Michael’s On East catering staff. I want to work with a staff who, when I walk in, immediately brings me a diet Coke with no ice without my asking. On top of that, Michael’s On East has the best food in town.

Dona wants to put the catering out to bid. I say fine. Get all the bids you want, just as long as Michael’s ends up the caterer.

Silent auctions—I hate them. They sometimes bring in lots of money, but not nearly enough for all the work involved. We decide to do away with the traditional silent auction and concentrate on what Selby does best—orchids. Those glorious blooming plants in an assortment of beguiling colors will be the only silent-auction items.

For the six years I've been on the Orchid Ball committee, each event has had a "location" theme inspired by some orchid-growing place. "Passage to India” was the theme for 2005. I want something new. When I chair things, I try to do something that’s meaningful to the organization and meaningful to me.

Last year, I was wholly immersed in the Selby Foundation’s 50th anniversary, and by now I know more about Marie Selby than probably anyone else in the world, with the exception of Debra Jacobs, head of the foundation. Marie was one fascinating woman. So I start thinking about the history of Selby Gardens with Marie as the centerpiece. Not literally, of course. I certainly am not planning on a bust of Marie as a table centerpiece…but come to think of it, maybe that’s not such a bad idea!

July 19. Send out letters asking former Orchid Ball chairs and committee members to join the committee, a stellar list of old Sarasota, along with new people to give it lots of energy. Get tons of yes replies—great opportunity to spread the work around. (I only wish that had turned out to be true—as it happened, about 10 percent of the committee did 90 percent of the work, along with a yeoman’s effort from Selby Gardens’ staff.)

I remember the old days when committee meetings were almost little parties in themselves and everyone looked forward to a morning or afternoon out. Not so anymore. Even in just the last three or four years, things have changed. People usually turn out pretty well for the first meeting or two, especially if there is some kind of food involved, and of course, most show up for the committee photo, but then they drop off dramatically. Who can blame them? When we have hundreds of charitable boards and committees in this town, not to mention ever-expanding work and personal obligations, it’s hard to stay on top of everything.