The goal is twofold. First, to inform them of the various ways Fleming's can offer them at-cost events and thus spread out their charitable budget. Second, to provide an evening of informal networking and idea swapping. And, to be frank, there's a third goal also: to dazzle them with food beyond their wildest dreams.

Present are Aundria Shootes from the All Faiths Food Bank, Estelle Crawford, development director for Girls, Inc., and Judy Graham, a prominent interior decorator who's been volunteering on boards for most of her career. Judi is there, of course, as well as Fleming's operating partner Dan Schaefer and Debbie Allen, manager of Fleming's "private dining" division.

The room we are sitting in would be perfect for a private party, and it was in fact designed for that use. It's slightly raised with beautiful wooden shutters that can shut it off from the main room, so it's part of the restaurant yet somehow more exclusive. The entire restaurant is beautifully designed, full of gleaming wood and brass, like a modern version of an elegant men's club. It's hard to believe that the Social Security office is up on the second floor.

As Dan welcomes the guests, a plate of appetizers arrives, and these are enthusiastically discussed by all. Dan offers a lesson in steakology. "If you really like the flavor of fat," he says, "order a bone-in rib eye." Another hint: If you like your steak between medium and medium-well-done, say medium-plus. But don't say medium-rare-plus-there's no such thing.

Gradually the conversation comes back to fund raising. I'm impressed by the expertise involved. I've been active in various charity events over the years, but these women are on a whole other level. They discuss the finer points: how to divide up a room, how to "do an ask," how-if you're smart-you never schedule an event on a Sunday night. And most important in Sarasota-how to approach Northern Trust.

Cocktails arrive. Judi holds up her glass. "Here's to raising a ton of money!"

Soon the ideas are flying fast and furious. Judy Graham tells how Judi Gallagher is doing two programs for Mote Marine, where Graham is a board member, both of which will feature Mote's farm-raised shrimp. It's for the Mote Building Fund.

"Help us raise our roofs. Or is it rooves?"

"It would be really creative to serve some dish that looked like a tin roof."

"Maybe we can get the wine donated."

"A creative menu."

"Place settings with hammers!"

"Maybe somebody can pay to drive in the first nail."

"Great!"

Judi became seriously interested in charity events after the deaths, from cancer, of her mother and sister. She says she feels her fund-raising efforts honor their memories. In addition to helping to plan events, Judi is often the draw. She can do a cooking demonstration anywhere and has brightened many an otherwise limp and skimpy charity luncheon. She has a technique of wandering through the audience, encouraging, almost empowering. Quite a change from the young woman who was so self-effacing she once took an assertiveness training course.

Judi's other big project these days is her first cookbook. When she describes it, it sounds almost like her autobiography-recipes and stories from all periods of her life.

As we waited for our cars after dinner at Fleming's, she told me more about it. One story in particular meant a lot to her: She had recently visited the French Culinary Institute in New York and wrangled an interview with famed chef Jacques Pepin, Julia Child's TV partner (Child herself was well over six feet tall) and a legend in the world of cooking. Together they made his famous crêpes. The segment will be shown on Suncoast Cuisine this month.

"I was so nervous my knees were knocking," she recalls. "He must have sensed it because he looked up at me with the sweetest smile. 'You know,' he said, 'I love cooking with tall women.'"

Judi laughs.

"Mother would have loved it."